Tuesday, February 27, 2007


I believe that Rome is a truly excellent setting for Role-Playing. Why?

No police force.
Brutal laws that often involve death, but are reasonably understandable.
Bribery works like a charm.
A successful politician's career has no end of violence.
There's no law against carrying weaponry on your person.

It's like a Role-Playing setting already, but better fleshed out, and with more realistic avenues for advancement than, "I killed 2.700 orcs. Now I have a legion of followers who flocked to me for some reason."

Sunday, February 25, 2007

Won't Somebody Please Think Of The Children!

It seems like children are surrounded by corrupting influences: video games, movies, television news, and drugs. If only they would go to an opera, or read a novel, then they might turn out all right.

But it turns out that plays and novels are corrupting influences, too. When they first became popular, moralizing critics pointed out, accurately, that they prominently featured violence, infidelity, anti-religious themes, and sass-talk.

In fact, it seems that everything since the stone axe has been bad for humanity:
  • Dancing
  • Music
  • Playing Cards
  • Every Religion (Just ask a fanatic of a different religion)
  • Gender
  • Dice
  • Zippers
  • Novels
  • Plays
  • Anything that features Magic of any kind (I assume there is an exception for the Bible)
  • Role-Playing Games
  • Trading Card Games
  • Video Games
  • Pornography (Interesting piece of trivia: Americans spend as much on Pornography as they do on international foreign aid)
  • Sports
  • Communism
  • Industrialism
  • Capitalism
The strange things about all this, is that the same people who decry these things seem to have little time to attack the things that cause direct harm and deprivation (War, pollution, etc.)

Wednesday, February 21, 2007


A while ago, Ken Jennings pointed out that if Reincarnation is real, then it seems possible that you would be the reincarnation of whoever died at the time of your conception. With a share of guessing and laziness, I have determined that I am the reincarnation of Michel Foucault.

Too bad. I don't like anyone that can be described as "Modernist" or "Post-Modernist". C'est la Vie.


Thanks, T-Rex!

Monday, February 19, 2007

Redefining History

The current historical system has an ethno-centrist element that is completely unacceptable in the modern world: The use of AD and BC, which some of the PC police have replaced with CE and BCE. Whether you use AD or CE, everyone knows what event we are supposedly 2007 years after.

I propose a remedy: we choose some random date, then attach two random letters for before and after it.

Here's the new dating system: what is currently 571 AD becomes the year Zero. Any time afterward becomes AM, and any time before is PM. People may get this confused, since the AM and PM are the reverse of our Ante Meridian and Post Meridian, but I don't care.

Saturday, February 17, 2007

Bush and Iran

What in the world is the Bush Administration up to? They just can't want to invade Iran. I know they have the most optimistic possible take on military actions, but they just can't think they the US is capable of taking on Iran in addition to everything else on its plate.

Some have suggested that they are setting up the case for Iran ruining the Iraqi occupation: "Iran is the reason Iraq didn't work out". This seems possible, but I suspect something else is going on here.

Wednesday, February 14, 2007


I should start a cooking school. It would be the "add cheese!" school of cooking. Lessons would feature buying cheese, adding cheese, and guidance for lactose intolerants.

I would not teach making pancakes. Every time I make pancakes, I make at least one freak, and I set off the fire alarm.

PS. One point for the person who guesses where I got the title to this post.

Saturday, February 10, 2007

Quote Contest III

OK. Another themed quote contest. Every quote has two commonalities: they all feature the same word. That word has been blanked out in each quote. They're in order of difficulty. The quotes are worth a point, and so is the mystery word.

1) "And I'm his good friend ______!"

2) "I feel like I was mauled by ______."

3) "So, you guys don't believe in Robot ______?"

4) "Sweet Zombie _____!"

5) What is the mystery word?

Wednesday, February 07, 2007


As you know, the blog currently requires my approval to post comments. I don't particularly mind this, as there aren't a whole lot of them, so it isn't much work to approve them.

I was wondering if you guys would prefer to have a system that would automatically register posts immediately. The downside is, you would have to do one of those, "Type the letters above to prove that you're not a bot" tests.

If you have any thoughts on the matter, just leave a comment.

Monday, February 05, 2007

Themed Quote Contest

This is a very special Quote Contest. Same rules as normal, with one addition: guess the theme, win another point! Wooo!

1. "I swore I'd love you 'till the end of time... so now I'm prayin' for the end of time."

2. "Is this the real life, Or is this just fantasy?"

3. "To mold a new reality, closer to the heart. Closer to the heart!"

4. "The color of infinity's inside an empty glass."

Sunday, February 04, 2007

Quote Contest Issue

The problem with choosing quotes for the contest is Futurama. A single episode will have easily twenty good lines.

Futurama is just too good.

Thursday, February 01, 2007



We did it! We finally got my new address on the google search for "carsonist". Witness the glory:

That's right. Suck it, that teenager with a crappy blog, and that guy with a Nation-States account that mentions carsonist once! Woooooo!

If you look further on the search, there isn't a single entry in the top ten that isn't one of my many accounts. Hooray for me.