Sick as a very sick dog

I am extremely sick. Have you ever vomitted so hard that it came out your nose? It's very unpleasant.

You learn something new every day.

A Joke I Thought Up

Once you walk a mile in a man's shoes, you can probably stop. He's probably given up on getting them back.

War of the Worlds

Two problems with War of the Worlds:

1. Everyone was inexplicably fleeing in the same direction. In a global invasion, people would just aimlessly wander. Anyone who's seen lots of science fiction would know that.

2. When Tom Cruise's son turned out to be alive at the end, I was outraged. That has to be the worst cop-out of all time.